NHS

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25 random things about me… if you’ve nothing else to read.

Published June 9, 2012 by KalamityK

Try doing your own. It’s not as easy as you’d think.

If nothing else, it passes the time. 

1. I nearly always think before I act…sometimes too much… if I don’t, I always seem to make the wrong choice. 

2. I can be extremely indecisive. I hate being the one to make a decision. ‘No I don’t know which film to watch. What do YOU wanna watch? I’m not fussed, what do YOU wanna watch?’ Arghhhh! It’s like being stuck on a loop.

3. I hate having to apologise to anyone, so most of the time I hold my tongue rather than say what is on the tip of it!  

4. I have an addictive personality, hence the daily dose of chocolate, carbs and facebook! (and until the newness wears off, blogging) yep, sometimes all at once. 

5. I really enjoy my own company. 

6. My knees turn to jelly & my stomach does somersaults at the thought of talking in front of groups of people. Doesn’t matter if it’s 5 people or 50. Jellysaults!

7. I have worked for the NHS for almost 16 years. 

8. I love photography and wish I’d known it 20 years ago so I could have learnt to do it as a career. 
Mind you, I also needed to know back then that I actually WANTED a career. All I wanted growing up was to get married and have tons of babies.  

9. I am a bookworm. I quite like the idea of being a librarian and have even investigated the possibility, partly because of the instant access to so many books (because I hate paying shop prices for them). Approx 80% of my books are from charity/second-hand bookshops. It’s crap money though and there isn’t the need for librarians that there once was, plus nowhere in my county does the right uni course and I’m not motivated or self disciplined enough to do distance learning.

10. My parents and my son are the most important people in my life. If I need to be wise, I pretend to be my mum and then think about what she might do or say. It’s come in handy for those times I’ve had to fake it. 

11. I’d love to be in love but I honestly do enjoy being single. I’m quite set in my ways…plus maybe I haven’t met the right man to entice me to share the remote control.

12. I never learnt to drive. If it does ever happen, I want a Robin Reliant or a pink/purple moped. Most likely a moped. 

13. I own a (pink) flute although can’t remember how to play it (apart from a couple of simple crimbo carols). 

14. I love shoes and own many many pairs but I only buy the bargains. High heels are just divine but I just can’t walk in the damn things on these bumpy, uneven pavements.

15. My bestest friend uploaded me off the internet. My other bestest friend found me at a bus stop.

16. I hate having cold feet cos it stops the rest of me warming up. I hate having hot feet cos it makes the rest of me overheat.  

17. I am a nightowl and think mornings should be banned. 

18. Hello, my name is Kalamity and I’m a hoarder. (Professional help needed) Don’t throw that out… it might come in handy!

19. I can’t/won’t leave home without putting on my lipstick, even just to pop to the shop downstairs. Forget the rest of the slap, it’s all about the lippy.  

20. I’m convinced sprouts are the work of the devil. 

21. I don’t like coffee. Tea for me please….squeeze the teabag, plenty of milk & 1 sweetener, Ta. 

22. I always have the telly on when I’m indoors whether I’m watching it or not. 

23. I cannot bear those eating sounds people make when they have bad table manners and if you eat an apple anywhere near me, it’s likely to end up out the window. I regularly resist the urge to tell people how gross it is that I can hear them eat when they don’t shut their mouths. Seriously, I don’t want to see your food swilling around your gob, neither do I want to hear it. Plus, sorry but if you chew gum it make you look like a cow chewing the cud. Maybe I’m a snob but it just looks common.  

24. I’m a gadget girl. If I had the cash, I’d buy every gadget made. 

25. I bought my son a pet snake when he was about ten or eleven. He gave it back the following year because it didn’t grow big enough to eat people. He said it was boring. 

Hello world!

Published June 5, 2012 by KalamityK

Wow! I’m actually here. So are you!  O M Effin’ G! I don’t know what I’m more surprised about, the fact that you’re here reading this or that I wrote it in the first place. Don’t s’pose it matters really so… Hi!

I never thought I’d do this because I didn’t really think I had anything to say and even if I did find something to say, I couldn’t fathom why anyone would want to read it. But you know what, I need somewhere to vent…. so why not use a blog?! Some people start pages on Facebook to save their sanity but if I did that I’d no doubt cock it up and somehow mix it up with my ‘real’ profile which could be hilariously disastrous. It just aint worth the risk. I’m thinking if I’d done this years ago I might not be the mental headcase I am today.

I work more or less fulltime for the NHS in medical sciences and I’m an ordinary single mum living with a teenage son in South East England. I’ll call him the manchild because he’s legally a man but he’s still my child and he’s got some growing up to do yet. He’s already done a lot of growing up in the last 3 years but like the rest of us, he’s a work in progress. He’s got his faults and I’ve got mine. For the most part, we get on great (now) but it’s been a rough ride at times. I’m not exaggerating when I say we’ve been to hell and back in a rowboat. As he is the most prominent and loved person in my life, I suspect this blog will feature him a lot. Especially when he makes idiotic lifestyle choices that fill me with horror and dread and despair. No doubt my colleagues will feature a fair bit too as most of my day to day life is spent with them and they’ve been my daily companions for the last 10 years… and they have the power to irritate the hell outa me even though my life wouldn’t be the same without them!

There will most likely be more than a few rants about apples too. That one will explain itself eventually.

I should probably warn you now, I moan a lot. It seems like a lot to me anyway, especially since I gave up smoking a few months ago. But I see that as part of being British and I’m all about being patriotic 😉 Aren’t us Brits well known for moaning?! It’s probably not one of our better attributes but if I can’t vent somewhere in writing then there’s every chance I’ll explode. So here I am, setting up my own little cubbyhole ont’ tinterweb to vent and moan and cry and laugh and crack stupid jokes and be sarcastic. There are so many people in my life and I’ve started this because I want to try not to inflict my issues on them. I’m so much bitchier now I don’t have cigarettes to de-stress me. I’m actually rather looking forward to this! Is it wrong to enjoy the potential to grump n groan a little bit? It has to be honest or what’s the point? Ah well, it is what it is.

I will endeavour to be entertaining whilst I get my grump on!

Kalamity K 🙂

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